Lost but not without hope

SO my lawsuit was today against Better Birth of Utah. The Judge was inclined to rule in my favor until Tara Tulley, a social worker (since 3 months ago…) came up and said her opinion was that there is no way that forced vaginal examination could cause post traumatic stress disorder in a patient. Yep. She said that Better Birth couldn’t have done anything differently to prevent causing damage to me, and that the standard of care is to keep exams going while patients beg you to stop. SO much for the ‘midwifery model of care’.

Whenever a new midwife says that its okay to treat women this way a bunch of them want to tell me how ‘all midwives aren’t like that’. I just keep getting proved correct over and over again- midwifery is full of sketchy people who are more interested in keeping their scam going than anything else.

She pretended to only be superficially in league with Suzanne Smith (they have attended the same midwifery meetings sometimes, etc), but I’ve already found evidence that they founded a political committee intended to protect midwives who get on the wrong side of the law. What caused the sudden move to action, you may wonder? A dead baby caused by gross negligence. These midwives rally support around a woman who negligently killed a baby and want to make sure that midwives can still practice in utah without getting a license. Its disgusting.

(edited to add- they deleted the evidence so the above links are dead. You can read about it here until I get the screencaps up)

Guess what? She is friends with Ester Werbach, the midwife who abused me. They talk on facebook. She did not disclose this to the judge.

I have a feeling that this will make the appeals process fly by, since the “expert” testimony is the only thing that saved Better Birth from paying what they owe.

What is worse is that Tara Tulley claims to be a therapist who specializes in helping people like me who were traumatized during birth. She claims to specialize in sexual abuse, while testifying against me as a sexual abuse victim. How disgusting is that? She had trouble being straight with the judge about how long she had been a LCSW. She keeps claiming 2 years on the internet but copped to having only gotten her LCSW in the past 3 months when he pressed her about it. She kept trying to convince the judge that my blog was proof of borderline personality disorder. I am not ashamed enough of being sexually abused, according to her. I am ashamed. But my concern for other people makes my shame a non-issue. I couldn’t leave other women to fall into the same trap that I did. Tara Workman Tulley was slippery and wouldn’t say directly that I had a personality disorder, but kept implying it repeatedly to try and discredit me. That’s ethical as hell for a new LCSW, right? (edited to add: the icing on the cake is that she posted about her history of abuse, an eating disorder, and self destructive behavior on facebook, so I guess she must have BPD too….)

Suzanne Smith’s position is basically that I imagined everything (somehow my husband caught my case of crazy when he witnessed all the events that transpired). She perjured herself and claimed to be in the room with me during the last exam I had. Its funny, that isn’t what she told the police when they interviewed her.

Its frustrating but its not over. Liars get caught because its impossible to keep all the details straight.


  1. I followed your link over from SOB. I haven’t read everything yet, but I will be going through archives later today I’m sure. I’m so sorry this is happening. It just seems evil to me what this Tully woman is doing. Evil, wrong and completely unethical, not too mention outside her scope of practice. I wish you the best of luck and the law on your side in your appeal.

  2. I’m a bit surprised that in your attempt to discredit Tara Tully, you linked to Dr. Amy Tuteur’s Skeptical OB blog. Perhaps you were unaware that Dr. Tuteur denies that “birth rape” is even possible:

    ‘“Birth rape” does not exist. It is a promiscuous abuse of the term rape for the sole purpose of garnering attention. The term is legally meaningless and ethically suspect. It is morally wrong to insist that a rape has occurred when nothing of the kind happened. It is ethically unjustified to misuse the term rape regardless of how worthy the motivation. And it is insupportable to base the accusation of a crime on how the victim “feels” about it.’


    1. I’m aware of amy teuters denial of birth rape. the article i linked to presented indisputable facts about tara tully’s support of a completely negligent midwife killing a baby. Amy’s beliefs don’t really have anything to do with the facts I presented. Here is tara tulley’s blog, you can read her beliefs about the world yourself if you want (she is the poster named ‘killtherun’):


      search her archives, see what she thinks about legislating the behavior of midwives. She even has a rant about how its important to support other midwives even if you think their practice standards are clearly dangerous to patients! Dr amy offends my sensitibilities sometimes, but she doesn’t excuse unnecessary danger and death like Tara Tulley and her ilk in the natural childbirth community.

      I think you should also be aware that Tara perjured herself in front of a judge by minimizing and denying her professional relationship with Suzanne Smith and Better Birth of Utah. Not exactly a smart thing to do when she had posted instagram pictures of the Better Birth team at her midwifery school….

  3. I was just looking at their website, and there is a section about negative reviews, and how they can’t know until it’s too late if someone is mentally ill and how sad that makes them.http://www.betterbirth.com/negative-review

    1. that is about me, they used a lot of those exact phrases in court. I must really be effective to be getting such a response.

      1. If they have a section to try and basically discredit what happened, then there is guilt. I don’t think I have ever seen another company’s site with a section just to counter negative reviews. Red flag!

%d bloggers like this: